If a woman finds the moch dachuk uncomfortable, she may omit it during the time that her body is still recovering from childbirth. Following the vaginal delivery of a girl, a woman may not immerse until fourteen days have elapsed since the birth. In practice, postpartum bleeding rarely ends soon enough for her to consider immersing earlier. Most health care providers instruct women to delay marital relations until about six weeks postpartum.
If the couple are considering using contraception , this is also the time to discuss the available options. It is normal not to get to the mikveh until at least a month or two after giving birth. Most of us feel sad or miserable at one time or another. Clinical depression is a mood disorder in which feelings of sadness, loss, anger, or frustration persist for an extended time to a degree that they interfere with everyday life. When this condition occurs during pregnancy or within a year of delivery it is called perinatal depression.
When it occurs within a year of childbirth, it is also referred to as postpartum depression. Diagnosis of depression during pregnancy is sometimes difficult as the normal changes of pregnancy often lead to similar complaints — fatigue, difficulty sleeping, and changes in body weight. Similar phenomena can also occur when a woman awakens frequently to care for an infant.
But when the symptoms are severe enough to affect the functioning of the woman or her family, and do not improve with simple interventions to assure adequate sleep, a diagnosis of depression should be considered. It is not uncommon for women to experience extremes in mood during the days after childbirth. Any of these within the first two weeks, as long as there are no serious thoughts of harming oneself or the baby, are normal and are not a cause for concern.
Simple interventions to assist the mother generally help her feel better. These include letting her nap when the baby naps and reducing to the absolute minimum any other household responsibilities of the new mother. Badei Hashulchan agrees. If a woman went to mikveh and then felt blood during tashmish while she was still within the days of yemey tahara, the Nodeh Beyehuda held that the man could leave with an erect ever, while Nachlat Tzvi argued.
This dispute is cited in the Pitchei Teshuva and Badei Hashulchan The Maharik writes that those who have the practice and claim that it is based on a legitimate source they may keep their practice, otherwise it should be abolished.
The Rivash 40 writes that if the minhag was really based on a rabbi who was strict so that the people don't come to be lenient about niddah it is legitimate, however, if it is based on a mistake that they think it is forbidden then we should abolish the minhag. The Bet Yosef comments that the Rambam could agree with this but he assumed that it was more likely based on a mistake than a major stringency. Several explanations have been proposed for the minhag including the following: The Maharik suggested that the minhag is based on a stringency not to come to be lenient about hilchot Niddah.
The Darkei Moshe cites the Maharil as agreeing with this reason. Levush adds that since it is very common for a woman who gave birth to see blood during these days, there is a concern she'll see blood but not realize. He admits that this reason is weak since blood that they see during yemey tohar is really tahor. The Agudah Pesachim b writes that the minhag is based on the opinion of the Bahag so as not to forget that the night of the 41st and 81st day the couple is forbidden to each other, therefore, they didn't go to mikveh beforehand.
The Bach accepts this approach. Badei Hashulchan explains that according to this explanation she may not go to mikveh before the night of the 42nd and 82nd. The Darkei Moshe writes that the minhag is based on the opinion of Rabbenu Tam that whether or not she sees during the days of tumah they can't be counted for shiva nekiyim.
Furthermore, as long as she hasn't gone to mikveh the days of yemey tohar also can't count for shiva nekiyim. According to Rabbenu Tam it is necessary to go to the mikveh twice, once to remove the tumah of birth and another to remove the tumah of zavah after shiva nekiyim. Since we don't go to mikveh twice for this purpose the minhag was to refrain from going to mikveh for 40 days for a boy and 80 days for a girl. In fact, according to this reason the minhag should be to go to the mikveh twice, but it is enough to be strict for the Rabbenu Tam in the main days of tumah and tahara.
The Darkei Moshe concludes that it seems that according to this reason they should be strict to start the shiva nekiyim only after the 40 or 80 days.
While the Bach holds that it is forbidden to break this minhag in a place where they have it and someone who does will be punished, the Taz argues that there's no good reason for the minhag, many people don't keep it, and there's no punishment for breaking the minhag.
Badei Hashulchan writes that many poskim rejected the minhag and so one shouldn't be strict unless one's parents were and even in such a case if a person's yetzer hara is great one can be lenient. A yoledet may not immerse until 14 days have passed since the birth of a girl, but postpartum bleeding rarely ends soon enough for this to be possible. A woman who undergoes a cesarean section is not halachically considered a yoledet a woman after childbirth. Thus, if she experiences no vaginal bleeding at all, she need not immerse in a mikveh.
This, however, is an extraordinarily rare occurrence as a woman almost always has vaginal bleeding as she sheds the remains of the uterine lining from pregnancy. This causes her to become niddah following a cesarean section. Unlike a yoledet , who delivered vaginally, she is not required to wait a minimum of 14 days before immersion following the birth of a girl.
However, it is unusual for a woman after birth to cease staining before a few weeks have elapsed, so this rarely has any practical implications. Childbirth produces wonderful results, but it is often a painful and frightening process. Both medical and halachic sources attest to the importance of emotional support for the mother during labor and delivery. First, a woman in childbirth has the status of a niddah.
Therefore, physical contact between the couple is prohibited and the husband may not see his wife undressed. Due to these concerns, many rabbis forbid the attendance of the husband in the delivery room.
There are, however, those who permit it with the following stipulations:. This is done routinely for cesarean deliveries and thus should not be difficult to arrange.
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